A Polish Man in London and The Fit Girl on the Tube

My homework for Writing London- Creative Writing About London this week was to:
Write a character description of a stranger. Like, someone you see sitting outside a cafe, on the bus etc. And then write what you think they think of you.
I didn't really stick to the brief but, hey, I'm an artist.

Check my writing skillz

4:30pm on the Central line, Eastbound. The bunch of yellow carnations are squashed and dirty. He’s been up and about since daybreak and is exhausted. But he’s clutching the flowers to his chest and smiling to himself.
He’d come to be with Ana. She’d been working as a cleaner while studying English s:
part-time. Her English was great to begin with- why did she need lessons? If anyone needed them it was him. He couldn’t speak English for shit. At school he’d been top of the class in almost everything but he had come to realise that this counted for nothing here. He couldn’t do plastering or bricklaying. He was no one.
Ana had said that there were lots of Polish people in the U.K. He wondered where they all were. He saw a lot of black people. A hell of a lot. And not just black, Indian, Chinese- they were all here. He kept his bag close.
Ana was living with 8 girls- 5 Polish and 3 Ukrainian. The Polish girls were all from big cities like Warsaw and they teased him, calling him “farmer boy”. He usually stayed in the bedroom whenever Ana was out- he thought that was for the best.
When Ana returned from work in the evenings they went to the pub with her friends. Her new friends. They all spoke English to each other. Ana translated as best she could until she got too drunk.
Ana has been in London for five months. The first month she was on the phone every night, crying and begging him to come and join her. He had booked a ticket as soon as he had the money. When she met him at the coach station she had cried and hugged him harder than ever before. But now she was distant and seemed to resent his presence. “I can’t hold your hand all the time!” she shouted. “You are supposed to be a man- go and get a job, make your own friends- look after yourself!”
Today is their anniversary. Three years since their first date. After Ana leaves, he ventures out into frosty, sunny London in search of the perfect gift. He’s heard that Oxford Street is the number one place for shopping so that’s where he goes.
Many hours later he returns, bruised, battered and triumphant. He lays the flowers on Ana’s side of the bed and collapses next to them, spent.


Yeah it's not like... properly finished though. So, I did that. And then I did this:

She’s looking at me and writing in a notebook. Is she a policewoman? She doesn’t look like a policewoman. Maybe she is undercover.
I wonder why she is wearing sunglasses on the train. She could be blind but I don’t see a stick or a dog. Maybe she just likes sunglasses.
Her handbag is made out of pink, see through plastic. There is a lot inside it. It is very messy.
Now she’s laughing at something the short man sitting opposite said. He is wearing sunglasses too. She’s telling him a story. She speaks fast and with a lot of exclamations. She makes the wanker sign with her hand. Now they are both laughing. She laughs like a witch.
She takes off the sunglasses and rubs her eyes. She looks tired. The short man hands her a wad of cash and she puts it in her purse, quickly. Maybe she is a prostitute? Or maybe not. She doesn’t look like a prostitute. She is wearing a cardigan.
They continue to chat animatedly. She doesn’t show her teeth when she smiles. Maybe she doesn’t like them.
She puts the sunglasses back up on, stands up and they get off at Debden.


My thoughts on both 'pieces':
I like parts of the first one. I like the basic idea and I like the character. It's obvious that I lost interest towards the end though. And it's not very good technically but who cares, really? Who cares?
The second was totally difficult and I am not pleased with it. Apart from She doesn’t look like a prostitute. She is wearing a cardigan. which I am sure is genius.

Oh- the wad of cash was the deposit for Gerel's new house and he asked me to hold onto it for safekeeping. Just to clear that up.